Things I Wish I Had Known Sooner in Life

I try not to live a life with regret, but there are a few things I wish I had known sooner in life, and I can't shake the feeling that this needs to be added to the regret pile. I'm trying to understand how I grew up not knowing the secrets and the pure for a successful personal life.

So, because I care about you and don't want you to make the same mistakes, I'm going to share some things I wish I had known sooner in life. If you're in your 30s  like me and don't know this stuff, I’m sorry for you, but we're in this together.

Financial Literacy

Friend, I am 31 years old, and the topic of finances raises my blood pressure.
I always joke that If I were ever arrested for anything, it would be for tax fraud or something along those lines. When I say that this stuff goes over my head, I'm not kidding. It's scratching the clouds. Financial literacy was never something that I was taught growing up or talked about in my day-to-day life. By the time I figured out how important it was, it felt harder to grasp. Understanding finances; how to earn, save, and invest money is a skill that will take you so far and position you for success no matter where your path takes you. It’s easy for us to make a dollar, but it’s just as easy to lose it if we don’t know how to steward it well. I’ve always been good at saving but even better at spending. It sounds contradicting, but trust me, it makes sense. I’ve always saved money to spend, lol. I’ve also made poor financial decisions that have gravely impacted my life. These decisions didn’t come from a lack of care but from a lack of knowledge. So, if you are reading this, please tap into financial literacy. It'll save your life.

The value of time

This is tough for me. I've never had a good relationship with time; I've never felt like I had enough of it, and yet I've wasted so much of it.

The thing about time is that it keeps going at a steady pace, and yet we often tell ourselves that time either goes by so fast or that it slows down.

The reality is that we control our perception of time. Whether or not we feel it’s going quick or slow solely depends on how we use it. When you’re doing something you enjoy, time tends to move quickly. But when you’re bored, it feels like it’s standing still. This concept also applies when you’re evaluating your life accomplishments. We often tend to regret what we didn’t do in the past and worry about our 5-year plan.

So.. how do you build a better relationship with time? Pay more attention to the moments. Focus on the present. Let go of what happened in the past and what you're worried about in the future. None of that will serve you, and you'll paralyze yourself and struggle with stagnancy while time continues to pass by. So make friends with time. Recognize that time is always moving, but at the same time, recognize that having time is a blessing; God willing, you will have plenty more of it. But what you do with it is up to you.

The power of saying no

This needs no explanation. I think I grew up only knowing the word yes, lol. I've always been someone who loved helping others, but my limits were often blurred. At some point, saying yes to others was the same as saying no to myself, no to my priorities, no to my plans, no to my boundaries, no to my future self. I’ve put so much of my plans on the back burner to fulfill what was asked of me, and that's not okay. I know you’re a good person, I know you love to serve others, and you’re probably a very reliable person. But please set your boundaries. Know what your limits are and set them before people set them for you.

If you don't, you will spend your life being a stepping stone for people to hop over on their way to their next goal. Don’t be that person. So put yourself first, please.

Even though I said that these are things I wish I had known sooner in life, I don’t believe it’s too late to know them now. So, whatever stage you’re at in your life, hold on to these reminders. If some of these apply to you, do what needs to be done to change and improve to set yourself up for a better future. There’s still a lot more life to live. So live it well.

What do you wish you knew sooner in life? Let me know in the comments.

And as always, I’m here for you.

Love, Deborah